*So and so said you do not look like a typical vegetarian. I love animals. (hmmm... the ones that are pets or the ones you eat?) I could be a vegetarian if I didn't like prime rib so much. I'm a flexitarian! Do cows eat eggs? Can you imagine how big your ass would be if you got pregnant? (can you imagine how your nose will feel when I break it if you ever say that again?) My wife is a vegetarian... she eats a lot of chicken! How did you gain so much weight? Ewww... tofu! The vegetarians can have salad. Do you eat scallops? Do you eat fish? Do you eat shrimp? What about the poor plants? I'd be worried about not getting enough protein. You can't eat that, it isn't on Weight Watchers! I could never give up bacon!
Just pass the sugar and shut up.
*Identity not revealed to protect the rude.